Week 10 Picks
As I write this post, I’m watching Curt Schilling on Celebrity Jeopardy. Let’s just say this might be the highlight of my month, if not for my birthday last week.
You know what? This tops it. Even better – he’s going up against some guy from “Desperate Housewives” and the mother from “Malcolm in the Middle”. And he’s getting his lunch handed to him, all while keeping a stupid little smile on his face. At the first break, he’s only rung in once (at least he got the question right). He’s in bad shape, in third place with only $200, as compared to the “Housewives” guy at $2600 and Malcom’s mom at $1800.
No way he lives this down next season. I’ll give running updates throughout this post.
Going into this week’s picks, I’m falling apart at the seams. 6-8 last week moving me to 57-65-6 for the season. Last year I finished the season at 135-112-9… I’m on pace for a 114-130-12ish year. That’s not good. I need to get healthy, and fast.
All lines from Sportsbook.com and accurate as of 7:30PM on 11/9/06. Home teams in CAPS
Chiefs (-1) over DOLPHINS: See, the ‘Fins pull off the biggest upset of the season to date, and suddenly they’re only 1-point dogs to one of the top 10 teams in football. I only bumped them up one spot in my “Rants & Ranks” this week – no way am I putting any money behind them anytime soon.
JAGUARS (-10.5) over Texans: Like I said on Tuesday – all David Garrard does is win. He’s not flashy, he’s not going to put up stat lines reminiscent of Peyton Manning or Mike Vick, but he’s going to win games, and keep
(Jeopardy update: Schilling just froze trying to remember which company’s tag line was “The
Chargers (-1.5) over BENGALS: I’ve completely given up on the Bengals at this point in the season. I’m only interested in them if someone is arrested, suspended, or spontaneously combusts. Seriously. There’s nothing else about them that I could care about anymore. Luckily, they can’t possibly fall below
Ravens (-7) over TITANS: Geez, three road favorites in the first four games… something’s gotta give. Well, the Ravens are one of the four best teams in the conference right now. The Titans are one of the four worst. Of course, the same could have been said about the Dolphins & Bears, last week…
COLTS (-12.5) over Bills: If Willis McGahee wasn’t hurt, I might have a little more faith in
Saints (+4.5) over STEELERS: HAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Sorry, I might be reviling in the Steelers’ demise just a little bit too much. Nice to see the Saints continuing to get absolutely no respect. By the way – considering how bad the Steelers’ pass defense has been the last three weeks, look out for Marques Colston & Joe Horn to have huge days.
(Jeopardy update: There’s a reason they don’t run Celebrity Jeopardy too often… it makes the celebrities feel very, very bad about themselves. The Final Jeopardy Category was “Celebrity Relatives”, and the Answer was “Her Great-Great Grandmother Louisa Lane Drew once appeared in a play with John Wilkes Booth” Now, I will admit, I did not know the answer. But considering that the category was “Celebrity Relatives”, I was pretty certain that the correct response would not be a fictional character.
Mrs. Malcom and Curt Schilling obviously didn’t catch that little fact. They both answered “Who is Nancy Drew?” I feel stupider for having watched it, and even moreso for having reported it to you. The Housewives guy got it right – the answer was Drew Barrymore. My head hurts. I’m going to bed early…)
EAGLES (-7) over Redskins: Eagles coming off a bye in Week 9, the best possible week to get some time off. The Redskins are coming off of a ridiculous win, a game that they deserved to lose, or at least take to overtime. Philly should be primed for this game, and should take it handily.
Bears (Pk) over GIANTS: It’s Week 9, and we just found the FIRST Pick-‘Em line of the season. That’s insane. I would love to take the Giants in this game, and even though I ranked them higher than
VIKINGS (-5.5) over Packers: Only because it’s in Minnesota, and after that barn-burner in San Francisco last week, the Vikings are going to look to take out a lot of frustrations. Brett Favre might have a big day, but the Packers defense is still too porous to slow down even the most inept offenses in the league. Like the Vikings’.
PATRIOTS (-10.5) over Jets: Like I wrote Tuesday, I feel really bad for the Jets this week. This game might get close late, but remember the last time they met, back in Week 2? Sure, it ended up as a seven-point game (Pats still covered the six-point spread) but the Pats were up 24-0 before they eased off the gas a little bit. Admittedly, the lack of Rodney Harrison worries me, especially giving up ten-and-a-half points. But I think after last week, the Patriots have a lot to prove.
49ers (+6) over LIONS: Much like last week’s Packers/Bills tilt, this is the weekly winner of the “Who the hell thought this was a good idea?” award…
Broncos (-9) over RAIDERS: So, if I told you before the season that one of the Bay-Area football teams would threaten to leave the area in order to try and secure a better deal for a new stadium from their home city, how many people would have thought that the 49ers would be the team, and not Oakland? 2%? 1?
SEAHAWKS (-3) over Rams: I’m not completely off the Rams’ bandwagon yet – I’ve still got my hand on the back bumper. But if they can’t manage to stop the Seahawks’ depleted offense this week, I’m done with them. They should have learned from their past mistakes – all the offense in the world doesn’t mean a thing if you can’t stop the other team. Except in 1999 – that was just a freakish thing.
Cowboys (-7) over CARDINALS: Let’s put it this way – the Cardinals are so bad, that I am voluntarily starting Tony Romo in my fantasy league. My other option is Mike Vick vs. the Browns – the fourth-worst rushing defense in the league. And I’m still taking Romo (along with Julius Jones and Terry Glenn). All my eggs in one basket, and I’m OK with that.
PANTHERS (-9.5) over Bucs: I still think the Panthers have enough time to turn their season around and get into Wild Card contention. At 4-4, they’re tied with four other teams for second place in the Wild Card chase, one game behind
For the record, as I started writing this, the lines for the Atlanta/Cleveland game were all pulled off the board. I’m not quite sure why yet, but I’ll keep an eye on it. My guess is that the line probably opened at about
RECAP: Chiefs / JAGUARS / Chargers / Ravens / COLTS / Saints / EAGLES / Bears / VIKINGS / PATRIOTS / 49ers / BRONCOS / SEAHAWKS / Cowboys / PANTHERS / Falcons
OK, Survivor is in full effect, meaning I need to end this before I get completely distracted.
Lata.
posted by Big D @ 8:41 PM
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