Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Week 9 Rants and Ranks

Different format starting today. I figure I might as well put a costume on my normal post in honor of Halloween. Rather than write my usual Tuesday rants, adding a witty remark here and a random thought there, I’m going to break this down to real nuts and bolts football stuff.

I’m sure you’re all devastated.

Starting today, I’m going to do a weekly ranking of all 32 NFL teams. I know; it’s not exactly an original idea. Everybody and their brother has their own version of weekly
”Power Rankings”. I’m not exactly breaking new ground here.

I do vow, however, to come up with a far better name than “Weekly Power Rankings”. I’ll work on it.

So, without further ado:

WEEK 9 “RANTS AND RANKS” (Hey, that just might work…)

1) Indianapolis (7-0): Yup. I’m putting them above Chicago. Chicago’s opponents have a combined record right now of 13-30. Indy’s opponents have a combined record of 24-26. Conclusion – both teams are 7-0; the Colts have done it against better teams. Maybe not more impressively, but against better opposition. That gives them the top spot in my book.

2) Chicago (7-0): See above. Although, the Bears’ schedule lends itself nicely to a 15-1 or 14-2 season…

3) New England (6-1): Admit it – you forgot how good this Patriots team was, didn’t you? Look at the rest of their schedule – they still get to play Green Bay, Detroit, Miami, the Jets, Houston, and Tennessee. Can you say 13-3, minimum? (BTW – Bold prediction of the week: The Patriots/Colts game next Sunday Night on NBC will be the highest-rated game of the season, for any network. That includes the Super Bowl. Think it’s a coincidence that the game falls at the beginning of November Sweeps Weeks?)

4) NY Giants (5-2): I basically flipped a coin to decide between the Giants and the Broncos. Both teams have losses to Indy. Both teams look like they’ve got game-controlling, dominant defenses. But I trust Eli Manning a hell of a lot more than I trust Jake Plummer.

5) Denver (5-2): Really expected more out of them against the Colts this week. That was a winnable game. You think any other team leaves that much time on the clock for Peyton Manning to work with? More importantly – how bad is Darrent Williams? He just looked lost out there…

6) Baltimore (5-2): One of two things is going to happen. Either Steve McNair is going to fall ill (I think leprosy is the only thing he hasn’t had to deal with in his career) or the Ravens are going to roll to the AFC Title Game. That defense is nasty enough to slow down a lot of teams, and if the offense is even competent (13-17 points a game), they are good enough to win a lot of the games left on the schedule.

7) Atlanta (5-2): Yeah, I know. New Orleans stomped Atlanta a few weeks back. But that was possibly the most emotional NFL game in the last five years, since the games the week after 9/11. I really believe that on a neutral field (or in Atlanta, where they’ll play later this season) the Falcons wipe the Saints out.

8) New Orleans (5-2): Another coin flip with Baltimore. Basically, the Ravens beat them this week (really, the Saints beat themselves), so Baltimore gets to be one spot higher. The Saints look legit, and whether it’s pure emotion driving them, or maybe they are better than a lot of people thought. But they sure are fun to watch, and even more fun to root for.

9) San Diego (5-2): But two of the next four games without Shawne Merriman (Denver & Cincy) are going to be tough. At least he smartly dropped his appeal of the suspension and won’t risk missing both Broncos games.

10) St. Louis (4-3): Even with the lack of defense, they have the offensive weapons to roll over a few teams. Remember 1999 and 2001? Yeah – the Rams didn’t have much defense those two years either. Both seasons ended up with a trip to the Super Bowl.

11) Minnesota (4-3): I’m not feeling real good about this placement, not after the way the Patriots exposed them for the entire world to see last night. But you’re never as good as your best game, and never as bad as your worst. I think the Vikings are a better team than the Patriots made them out to be, but if other teams were playing close enough attention, the Vikes will have to change game plans in a hurry.

12) Cincinnati (4-3): They need a defense, and fast. Unlike St. Louis, they don’t have the luxury of a moderately easy schedule the rest of the way. They’ll have to win some of those games the hard way, and right now, they don’t have the defense to do it.

13) Kansas City (4-3): Is this Damon Huard / Trent Green situation shaping up like Tom Brady / Drew Bledsoe? Moreover, when Green is ready to go, does he get the reigns immediately? I mean, the Chiefs are 4-2 with Huard – I can’t imagine that Herm Edwards just hands over the keys to the team if the Chiefs win two more games without Trent Green under center.

14) Dallas (4-3): Check that – Tony Romo / Drew Bledsoe looks like it’s going to end up as Tom Brady / Drew Bledsoe. Yeah, I know. I’m about the 948,142th different person to make that comparison. So what? The Cowboys are a better team with Bledsoe on the bench. I say he either goes to Oakland, Detroit, Tampa Bay, or off into the sunset of retirement next season. Maybe he could be the next Vinny Testaverde – stay in shape, sign a contract after Week six every season for whichever team loses their QB to a season ending injury.

15) Jacksonville (4-3): These next three teams are essentially a toss-up for me. I’ve got Jacksonville “on top” only because they beat Philly, and I think they could beat Carolina. But honestly, you try to figure these guys out.

16) Carolina (4-4): No reason to cough up that game against the Cowboys. But they’ve got the talent on both sides of the ball to finish the year with about 10 wins. Whether or not that’s enough for a playoff berth remains to be seen.

17) Philadelphia (4-4): In my season preview post, I put Philadelphia at 6-10 on the year. Within a day, I was recanting and trying to backtrack. Now I’m beginning to think I was right the first time. They’ve got four wins, and they came against Houston, San Francisco, Green Bay and Dallas. Admittedly, three of their four losses came on the last play of the game, including a blown offensive pass interference call against Plaxico Burress and a 62-yard field goal by a kicker that hadn’t broken 30-yards on any of his kicks before that. But still, can’t deny the fact that they’ve beaten one team over .500, and that was a hugely emotional game.

18) Seattle (4-3): Obviously, the return of Hasslebeck and Alexander will vault them back up this list. But for now, I’m counting on as many losses as possible. The more the better – that first round pick that Deion Branch cost them is going to be awfully sweet next Spring…

19) Pittsburgh (2-5): I hate myself for putting them this high, especially with a 2-5 record. But for as much as I hate the team, and as much as I’m taking a certain perverse pleasure in their monumental implosion this season, I just can’t believe they’re this bad. I still think they’ll finish the year closer to 8-8 than 4-12. Or maybe right in the middle at 6-10.

20) NY Jets (4-4): I’m not quite sure where to classify the Jets, so I’m putting them here for one simple reason: Of the remaining 12 teams to rank, I’m pretty certain that the Jets could beat every single one of them right now. And almost definitely if the game was at the Meadowlands.

21) Buffalo (2-5): Remember, this team barely lost to the Patriots on opening day, then beat the Dolphins (not tough to do) and the Vikings (slightly more impressive). Sure, they got smoked by the Bears and lost to the Lions, but I still think their defense is strong enough to keep them in most games. They just need a little more competence on the offensive side of the ball.

22) Green Bay (3-4): Hey, at worst, Brett Favre is having fun again. That is reason enough for him to come back and play this season. Well, that and his $7M base salary ($10M with incentives…)

23) Tennessee (2-5): Vince Young looks like he’s a slightly more conservative Mike Vick. He is managing games, limiting his mistakes and doing enough with both his legs and his arm to get his team a victory. And there’s not a team below the Titans that could stop him.

24) Houston (2-5): David Carr gets a mulligan for last week. Let’s not go doing things we can’t take back. Like voluntarily starting Sage Rosenfels.

25) Washington (2-5): This season is essentially lost, as they’re already three games out of the division lead. It says a lot that they’re not willing to put Jason Campbell into a game yet. Either he’s not what they hoped he’d be, or the coaches and GM are far too stubborn about cashing in now and building for the future.

26) Tampa Bay (2-5): I can’t put them any higher, even though I think they could beat a couple teams above them. They have two wins this year – one was a direct result of a horrible officiating call, the other came on a near record setting last second field goal. Not like they’re dominating anybody yet.

27) San Francisco (2-5): Their defense can’t stop anybody, but before last week’s implosion against the Bears, the offense was surprisingly competent. It hasn’t translated into wins yet, but for a team that finished last in their division in ’05, the schedule makers didn’t do them a whole lot of favors this year.

28) Cleveland (2-5): If they finally learn to trust their offense, this team could get dangerous in a hurry. They’re no threat to the Ravens and Bengals this season, but give them another year under Romeo Crennell and whoever takes over an offensive coordinator permanently, and they could do some serious damage.

29) Detroit (1-6): They really need to learn to play defense. And to stop drafting wide receivers. Charles Rogers is already gone; Mike Williams has played himself into the #6 role on the depth chart for most games. They’ve gone 1-3 on their wide receiver drafts. At least Ernie Sims looks like he might develop into a decent player.

30) Miami (1-6): They’re the exact opposite of Detroit. The defense is good (not spectacular, but good), but the offense can’t get it together long enough to sustain any type of drive. They need to figure out what went wrong and fix it, fast. Zach Thomas, Jason Taylor and the rest of the defense can’t carry this team for many more years.

31) Oakland (2-5): I’m not a believer. If they can take down a depleted Seahawks squad next Monday Night (finally – I can go to bed early on a Monday!) Then maybe I’ll give them some respect. But they’ve beaten up on a dejected Cardinals team, and they beat the Steelers while only producing about 90 yards of total offense. If that isn’t the definition of a “flukey” win, I don’t know what is. Maybe winning on a 62-yard last second field goal.

32) Arizona (1-7): This team is lost. On the plus side, a 1-15 or 2-14 season should put them atop the draft. They already have an offense to build around. They can deal a high pick for a boatload in return and build both the offensive and defensive lines.

That’s it for now. Hit up the comments or the e-mail link below and let me know what you think of this format. Don’t worry – most of the ranks won’t be nearly as long or well-thought out (not sure if that’s good or bad…) Anyway, lemme know what you think,

Lata.

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