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Week 12 Picks

Short and sweet on the picks today everybody. I played a game of pick-up football yesterday, and today my body is revolting. I figure, since I can’t actually stand up from my chair, I might as well grab the ‘ol laptop and start typing…

Went 2-1 on the Thanksgiving Day, missing only the Cowboys/Bucs game. Also, as a side note, Troy Aikman has now vaulted into the top five on my “Announcers that I Hate the Most” list. Here’s the deal: Wednesday night, I had planned to rebuild my laptop because it was so bogged down with crap that it was just about useless. I spent about six hours loading, unloading, and reloading software to get the system back up and running.

When I went to bed, I intended to wake up and check all my fantasy teams before kickoff. I got up and checked my NFL.com league. I had Jake Delhomme (vs. Washington) and Chris Chambers (vs. Detroit) in my starting lineup, and Tony Romo & Terry Glenn on the bench. I wrestled with the decision for about twenty minutes, not wanting to go against my gut instinct of Delhomme & Chambers against two of the four worst passing defenses in the league.

In the end, I decided to change to Romo & Glenn… only by that time, it was too late and my lineup was locked. I hadn’t refreshed the page in time, and Romo & Glenn got stuck on my bench…

Along with their 62 combined fantasy points and seven combined touchdowns. But at least Chris Chambers had two catches for 23 yards. I need Jake Delhomme to put up eight touchdowns and 500+ passing yards (without an interception) for this to have been a good idea.

As for Troy Aikman… well, you’ll read more about him later.

All Lines from Sportsbook.com and current as of 5:30PM on 11/25/06. Home team in CAPS.

Jaguars (-3) over BILLS: This is a tough pick, right off the bat. Jacksonville is ridiculously inconsistent, and Buffalo never loses at home. Well, almost never. But the Jaguars have the better all around team, and even if I do think that this game is going to come down to who has the ball last, I’m taking them and giving the points.

JETS (-5) over Texans: This is the game Chad Pennington needs to get healthy in a hurry. He should explode against a very suspect Houston secondary. Not to mention that teams from the South don’t exactly have a stellar track record playing up North in late November…

RAVENS (-3) over Steelers: I will not get sucked into the Steelers’ late season run… I will not get sucked into the Steelers’ late season run… I will not get sucked into the Steelers’ late season run…

Bengals (-3) over BROWNS: Tough loss against Pittsburgh for Cleveland. But I suppose that after Ohio State held on against Michigan, the football fans of greater Ohio had used up all their karma for one weekend. And since the Buckeyes aren’t playing this weekend, at least one part of Ohio is allowed to be happy on Sunday.

Cardinals (+6.5) over VIKINGS: Wow, did I get a concussion or something yesterday? I mean, how else can you explain this pick? Oh, that’s right – the Vikings are abominable right now. Plus, the Cardinals main offensive weapon – the passing game – is also the Vikings biggest defensive weakness.

49ers (+5) over RAMS: Is anybody else pulling for the Niners to make the playoffs, just so we could have the first ever 30-point playoff spread?

Saints (+3) over FALCONS: I’m officially off the Falcons’ bandwagon as my “Sleeper Team” of 2006. I’m going to stick with my original pick of New England and Carolina in the Super Bowl, and cross my fingers. At least until one of them is ousted from the playoffs.

Panthers (-4) over REDSKINS: Personally, I think Delhomme could pull off the 500+ and 8TDs I need out of him… I mean, the Skins are pretty bad right now.

PATRIOTS (-3) over Bears: Two things worry me about this game – first, this is the first time the Pats have played on the field-turf at home, so it might be a slight adjustment. Second, New England punter Josh Miller is out for the year with a shoulder injury, meaning that the Pats just resigned old friend Ken Walter. You know, the guy who hasn’t played pro football in two years, and when he last played, he sported a nifty 32ish yards per kick average. Yeah, that guy.

Giants (-3) over TITANS: Even with all of the Giants injuries, and even with the inspired football that Tennessee has bee playing lately, there’s no way New York should lose this game. Period.

CHARGERS (-13.5) over Raiders: Remember when I said I wasn’t going to take a double-digit favorite again this season unless the game involved Arizona or Detroit? Well, add Tampa Bay and Oakland to that list as well.

COLTS (-9) over Eagles: Who do you think had the worse feeling in their stomach last weekend when Donovan McNabb was lost for the year – Eagles fans as a whole, or the NBC executive who chose this game over Chicago/New England for the weekly flex scheduling during November Sweeps?

SEAHAWKS (-8.5) over Packers: Even though I think Brett Favre does his “superhuman return from injury” thing this week, just so all the national sports guys can gush some more man love about him on Tuesday morning…

RECAP: Jaguars / JETS / RAVENS / Bengals / Cardinals / 49ers / Saints / Panthers / PATRIOTS / Giants / CHARGERS / COLTS / SEAHAWKS

Now, the reason behind my newfound hatred for Troy Aikman.

Quote of the Week (I):

Late in the game against Tampa Bay on Thanksgiving, Aikman took a second to remind me just how much I hate being wrong.

"Well, if you have Tony Romo on your fantasy team, you're probably having a pretty good Thanksgiving. Even more, if you have Terry Glenn too."

Fuck you Troy. Why don't you go ram your head into a wall and try for another concussion?

And now a quick one to make me feel better about myself.

Quote of the Week (II):

From yesterday’s pick-up football game. I spent most of the afternoon on defense playing either one on the line or dropping back into pass coverage as a “shadow” linebacker. Every so often on the line, we did our best to surprise the offense by pushing the blocks to the right and having me stunt around to the left. Worked pretty well when we used it.

So, a new kid showed up on the line (he had been playing at receiver most of the day), and we figured it would be a perfect time to run a stunt and surprise him.

My buddies Tim and Jay were on the left side of the line and at nose tackle, respectively, and I was outside on the right. At the snap, Tim (in his “Superman Returns” T-shirt) pushed to the center, and Jay pushed right. I came around the outside and got right up on the QB, forcing a horrible pass and nearly a pick.

Walking back to the huddle, I heard the new kid muttering to the center:

“Damnit – I had Superman all locked up over there, and then this fucking train came around the outside on a stunt and I got all messed up…”

Yeah, I like that. Maybe now I’ll go around as the “D-Train” rather than Big D.

On second thought, uh, no.

Lata.

posted by Big D @ 6:17 PM