Tuesday, October 12, 2004

2004 ALCS preview

Some quick hits before the apocalyptic 2004 ALCS begins tonight...

- In Sunday’s New England win over Miami, Dan Dierdorf actually said that Charlie Weis was like New England’s version of Mike Martz. Someone please remind me to strangle Dan Dierdorf, slowly, and as painfully as possible. Maybe I should use barbed wire or something.

- There is nothing as inspiring to me as a motorcycle convoy rolling through your neighborhood. Well, maybe a bald eagle flying over the Grand Canyon at sunrise with a miniature American flag in its beak, but a motorcycle convoy is a close second. I sat in my driveway waiting to pull onto my road as over 120 motorcycles, mostly Harley’s, rumbled past. Great sight. Not the drivers, but the bikes.

- How inept is the Dolphins’ offense? Think they’d take Ricky Williams back now, impending drug suspension and all?

- What’s the deal with the wedge return formation in football? And by that, I mean why do the blockers hold hands until the last possible second before impact? It seems to me that you would want your hands free in order to block an oncoming rusher rather than attached to another 250+ lb. man who very well could fall on your arm and shatter it in a few different places...

- Daunte Culpepper is a machine right now. My apologies to my boy Blaze for all the shit I gave him after he took Daunte #2 overall in our fantasy draft. This past week, Blaze’s team scored 84 total points this week – Culpepper had 48 of them.

- I understand the profitability of licensing just about EVERY aspect of professional sports these days, but something tells me that this weekend’s NASCAR “The Spongebob Squarepants Movie” 300 is pushing the envelop just a weeee tiny bit, no?

- The display at the end of the LA/St. Louis NLDS was one of the best displays of sportsmanship I’ve ever seen. All of the other major sports engage in some sort of postgame handshake, why not baseball? In Little League, Babe Ruth, even some Legion ball leagues teams “line-it-up” at the end of the game and shake hands. Suddenly at the high school level the postgame handshake stops, and that’s not right.

- That being said, the aerial shots from Game 5 of the LA/STL NLDS proved to me, once and for all, that LA is the most boring sports city in the world. Even the pattern mowed into the grass on the field was boring and monotonous. C’mon, show some creativity people!

Finally, I need to clear up a misconception about myself and a recent away message I posted on my computer. Listen, I hate the Yankees on principle. I’m required to by Massachusetts State law. I would be much happier if they were in the National League and we only played them in interleague play and the World Series. But I respect each of their players immensely, because the majority of them are the best at what they do, and they generally do it with class. Is it their fault that the team they play for offered them a ridiculous amount of money to play there? Nope. Is it Manny Ramirez’s fault that the Sox pay him $20M yearly? Nope. But we still cheer wildly for him as if he were the local kid from the ‘ol ball field who finally got his big break.

I do not harbor any ill-will towards any of their players directly. In fact, I do not wish harm on any professional athlete simply because of the team they play for or their actions on the field (except maybe Aaron Boone. Or Mookie Wilson.)

That being said, the comment that I put up on my away message (that perhaps the Sox would have a better chance to win the ALCS after the tragedy involving Mariano Rivera’s family) was nothing more than a joke; an off-the-cuff, tongue-in-cheek comment that I thought was funny at the time. Honestly, do I speak naught but the truth? If Mariano Rivera is preoccupied with his family situation, WHICH HE SHOULD BE, then the Red Sox stand a better chance of beating the Rivera-less Yankees. Simple fact of life: if your team sports the best postseason closer of all time, and that closer doesn’t have his head (or maybe even his body) in the game for a postseason series, your team has a significantly lower shot of winning.

I'd love to write up a quick LDS recap / LCS preview, but I'm hungry, and it's dinnertime, and there aren't enough minutes to eat, prepare, and write a full column before Game 1, so I'll write something tomorrow, maybe Thursday.


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